Heidi Montag has pretty much given up becoming an actress or singer … let’s face it, she was horrible!

TMZ reports that the former MTV reality star has struck a $25,000 deal to appear at the Crazy Horse III strip club in Las Vegas on October 19th.

“I am so excited to host Crazy Horse III’s third anniversary celebration,” Heidi says. “I’m ready to party!”

Don’t get too excited … Heidi won’t be taking anything off.

A rep for the strip club told RumorFix that Heidi will pose, take pictures with photographers, then go inside the club where she is provided a table and bottle service and will party with club goers.

Basically, she’ll show off her fake boobs, then take a seat and proceed to get drunk with the patrons.

Heidi should have tried-out for the vacancy left at Peepshow by Holly Madison.