Sharleen Spiteri is my new hero. Honestly I had no idea who she was, but thank God she has the lady balls to stand up to Paris Hilton and her crazy giant feet. Sharleen is a singer. Gorgeous, gorgeous voice. Above is her song “All the Times I Cried.” Check it. Below is a video of her appearance on Graham Norton, which I believe is the British equivalent to Jay Leno, and talking about how she wants to kick the shit out of Paris.

“Paris Hilton arrived with a massive entourage and preceded to stand on one of the chairs at our table which had my mates’ coats and bags on it. She wouldn’t move so I put my straw in my drink, sucked some of it up and I blew it all over her.”

She goes on to say “I didn’t quite realise that I had opened the gates to hell. She was suddenly in our face giving it ‘You bitch’. I managed to get up saying ‘If you don’t get the f*** out of my face I’m going to kick the s*** out of you’.”

Security came and dragged Paris off after they manged to scream one more time at each other, “Then she went ‘Who the f*** are you anyway?’ I went ‘Does that matter when I’m going to kill you?’ ”

YES! Now that is a story to share with the grandchildren.

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