5

Michael Bay’s Rejected Batman Script is Pretty Much a Porn

mbays-rejected-script-1.jpg

Ok, so I don’t have much experience reading scripts and it shows. When I read Michael Bay’s rejected “Dark Knight” script my mind immediately envisioned a porn. Maybe it is just the way it reads but to me when I hear “pan to a beautiful woman: platinum blonde with a huge rack. She is the hottest woman in the world, but she wears glasses because she is also the smartest woman in the world.” I hear Peter Griffin reading his robot porn plot on “Family Guy.”

It even gets better….

mbays-rejected-script-2nd.jpg

“Rachel stretches against the open hood. The camera zooms in on her naked torso. It luxuriates on her toned stomah. Up it goes. Then down. Then up again. Slowly…slowly… Now counter-clockwise.”

Seriously…it sounds like a script from a one of those dirty phone call commercials on tv at 3 am. Moving on as Rachel Dawes, the heroine played by Maggie Gyllenhaal, apparently takes her top off to help Batman fix the Batmobile.

mbays-rejected-script-3.jpg

“She leans inot the engine, exposing her breasts, covered in prespiration. The camera zooms in and out on them, emphatically, a number of times.”

The only thing missing from that is someone bursting in to fix the copier. I am prayig that this is a fake script thrown into the world of internet gossip in order to punk our blogging world. Otherwise…this is sad.

mbays-rejected-script-4.jpg

[Spill]


Trending Videos ----


Are you following Allie on Twitter yet?

 



Comment Policy: By posting a comment, you affirm that you are 13 years of age or older. No hate speech or curse words allowed. If you must argue, please debate intelligently. Comments will be put into moderation to help prevent spam. Allie is Wired reserves the right to delete comments by anyone who doesn't follow the rules. Thanks for reading!

Comments section closes after 60 days.

Comments
Charles | July 8th, 2008

Uh, Cara?

I’m pretty sure it’s a joke.

Cara | July 9th, 2008

I know, but I found it hilarious. I just couldn’t help but make fun of it. =)

J Crowley | July 13th, 2008

But it makes fun of itself. Because that’s what the joke of it is — self-mocking ironic humor. Ironic parody doesn’t need further mocking — it just ends up ultimately detracting from the original joke. :P

bill_finger | February 14th, 2009

Ha. I love it. Transformers meets Armageddon meets Meet the Parents.

This is a joke, but it still reads a whole lot better than the proposed Batman vs. Superman movie.

jt | June 19th, 2011

i think it would be an awesome movie